Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
We're going as conductors of the hot mess train and nobody rides for free
Our tip jar will say "just put the tip in, see how it feels"
If you think you're having a bad day, know that upon waking up, I was informed that I blew my nose in a piece of bread last night
I heard the bride mutter "I should have brought a fucking tranquilizer". I'm not at all surprised that you got banned from the bar afterwards.
I have no idea why my husband is mad that I came home at 4 am & all I want to do is eat spaghettios. It's not fucking spaghettios fault.
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
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