just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
When we were eating pie last night, I dropped some, and not only did you not judge me for far surpassing the 5 second rule, you let me use your foot to sock mop with. You're a good friend.
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
Why are there condoms taped to the handle of Tito’s?
I get horny when I drink, pregnant when I fuck and I never lose the booze unlike my purse
Randomize