It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
Just saw a 300lb woman fall down. Shes screaming like a beached manatee. Her 120lb boyfriend is trying to push her up. It's like watching an infant try to bench
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
Did you have ill-advised lesbian sex on the deathbed of their relationship?
Of course. Go big or go home.
You're my fucking queen.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
Getting food poisoning after eating at work was the cherry on top of my "Welcome back to real life" sundae.
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
Randomize
