EVERY baby cries during their baptism. It's like they know from that moment on their parents are going to make them do lame things like their first communion and stuff.
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
After you finished the $300 bottle of wine you just started crying about how if Mulder and Scully didn't invite you to join the x-files your life would be meaningless because you "love that weird shit"
I just watched an old episode of Daria while eating brownies to cure day drunkness. Clearly I'm winning at adulting today.
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
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