3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
Randomize