We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
Randomize
