ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
Being drunk at Chick-fil-A is a dystopian experience
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
Randomize
