The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
Either my boss has an enormous dick or he’s hiding a can of tennis balls in his bike shorts
Maybe I will go to the company picnic
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
Randomize
