I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
I just had an epiphany. There is NOTHING TO STOP ME from making cake mix and eating it all instead of making a cake. It feels like my entire life has peaked at this moment.
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
Randomize
