So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
just told my mom that i'm having a bad day and she responded with "maybe you should pour yourself a nice drink". good to know that my parents support my future of alcoholism
i'm pretty sure they aren't charging me for that window i broke with a turkey sandwich while i was hammered.
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
Standing on the street at 6am in Hong Kong drinking beer. Watching all the hookers do the walk of shame from our hotel. How did I get here? Maybe all my bad choices in my life were really good ones?
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Randomize
