her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
It's no shave November. This is our time.
I'm prostituting myself for tickets to Disney World. There's a contradiction there.
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
