please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
But if you do poop yourself let me know. I want that as a tagline. "So funny she'll make you shit yourself."
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
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