at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
You were plastered and wouldn't stop telling this hot girl about your plan to graffiti a church in easter colored spray-paint saying that Jesus was a Zombie... she kept saying her father was a pastor...
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
Randomize
