let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
So unofficially, he told me he deleted tinder because of me. I think that's a pretty romantic gesture in 2018.
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize
