He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
yeah well we're currently on the phone and she's telling me about how much she misses me and all this shit and i muted myself and i'm watching porn.
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
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