STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
Uhm... Found a ziploc bag... In the freezer. Sam, thought it was lemonade. Why did you make frozen piss at my house, again?
In hindsight, maybe rearranging his living room because he has OCD while he was out wasnt the greatest idea. Though it'll keep him busy for HOURS
Randomize