She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
We were high as balls fucking in the back seat when we saw the blue lights. He's like, "I got this" and walked over butt ass naked and goes, "Sorry dude, we're just banging" and the cop apologized for disturbing us and drove off.
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
he high fived his dick after we had sex
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