spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
I caught her walking around with a fake mustache, wearing a sombrero and holding an empty carton of milk. She's a hopeless cause.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
Randomize
