a guy named alex was hitting on my friend tonight. he doesnt work on wind turbines tho.
Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
Randomize
