her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
Randomize
