i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
I fell asleep with a half eating burrito in my hand and woke up to cat vomit with burrito in it.
Randomize
