so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
For Halloween this year I'm gonna go as Angelina from Jersey Shore. I'm gonna yell "umm HELLO?!," cockblock someone, then leave the party early
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
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