My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
We had to coat check the pizza.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
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