Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
do you have any idea why i woke up naked spooning my toaster?
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
I'm worried I'm going to miss my flight so I set a series of alarms on my phone to act as checkpoints to make sure I'll be there. 2am-stop drinking; 4am-stop fucking stephanie, get some sleep; 5am-wake up, fuck stephanie once more; 6am-get to the airport
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
I just want to make out with him forever
Throwing my sister a bisexual bachelorette party was the best idea ever. I made out with both strippers and the hot bartender promised to "gay marry" me if I take him as my date to the wedding.
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