god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
We invented "Diesel Bombs." They're supposed to be a bomb, but they come in a 20+ oz. glass and have a blackout record of 6 wins and 0 losses. Undoubtedly going to be the next Muhammed Ali of the drinking world.
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
According to my snapchat story, I tore a fake wig off a security guard and ran away with it.
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
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