My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT
so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
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