She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
Bro, I live in a constant state of existential dread and moderate ennui. The prospect of cosmic horror doesn’t faze me that much.
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
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