the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
When I start puking tomorrow, just let me be. it'll start around 8:35. just let me heave. i love this part of my morning.
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
Randomize
