Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
It's just like the Real World with babies
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
Last time I heard from you, you were double fisting strawberry milk and wine. Answer this text so I know you're still alive. Bonus points for a coherent answer.
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
Guess who figured out you can fit an entire bottle of champagne in a big Subway cup. Open container laws my ass.
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
I am going to tweet NASA until they put me into space
Those rocketship riding assholes need the common man
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
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