I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
Just took an adderall with a shot of tequila while doing my makeup in the parking lot at work before I go in. I'm also late. They're so lucky to have me.
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
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