he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
Dude, she's so old there's a chalk outline where her reproductive organs used to be.
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
Did you get drunk between now and two texts ago?
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
Randomize
