he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
:(. i have vodka in a fire extinguisher. that solves all problems. except fires. it would actually make that worse.
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
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