It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
My girlfriend and my fuck buddy both started their periods this weekend. The good news is, neither of them are pregnant. The bad news is, I'll have to find someone else to fuck til next weekend. No wait.....that's good news too.
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
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