People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
That one life defining moment when you catch yourself pouring whisky into your hot chocolate at 4 am, whilst crying and talking to your dog.
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
Randomize
