a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
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