I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
areolas are like halos for boobs.
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
the wedding party just walked in to the song eye of the tiger. i'm getting drunk.
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
Randomize