Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day
hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
I'm officially "accidentally set myself on fire" drunk
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
#1 lesson to be learned from mardi gras this year: lock your car doors or some grimy dude like me might just bang in it and use your backseat as a kleenex
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
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