Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
i actually looked down at my cock today and said "whoa buddy, you need a haircut....(grimace) and a shower"
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
She is a social worker. An actual good person trying to save the world. I feel like every time I give her an orgasm God wipes a little smudge off of my shit list.
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Randomize
