her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
I'm gonna die fat and alone and all they will find is pizza crusts
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
You know you were way drunk when you wake up at 7 AM halfway on a couch, tangled in a sheet with your shoes still on.
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize
