I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize