i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
