He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
this morning your mother said to me "sorry to have to meet you like this, in my sons bed" later she said "you never know whos gonna be in there. its scary sometimes"
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
When I planned out my evening, "co-author lesbian vampire erotica" was not anywhere on my list of expected activities.
Me neither, but hey, this is where we've ended up. Let's embrace the moment.
Randomize
