sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
I cant help but love a girl who informs me of the pregnancy test results by emailing me a YouTube clip of Barney Stinsons not a fathers day speech.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
Sorry didnt text you yesterday. had to put restraining order on my ex.
Randomize
