Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
This just in: I met a girl who does the phone sex phone lines, and shes' 5'4" 320. I'll never get a hardon again through a phone.
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
there are 5 pictures on my phone from last night, 4 are too blurry to recognize and the 5th is you dangling a twizzler over your mouth, naked.
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
