I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
I may or may not have been feeling patriotic and banged Captain America in a closet. SPOILER ALERT: We broke his shield
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