we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
Couch. On fire.
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