We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
I miss my teeeeeeeeth. They're in a bag in my hand.
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
She showed up at 4:30 in the morning HAMMERED, stripped, demanded sex, then after 4 failed attempts stopped me mid-thrust to tell me she thought we should be fucking for a cause, like animal rights. Process that for a second. She wanted us to be fucking for animal rights.
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
Randomize
