I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
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