You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
I am dying of drunk and no thats not a typo.
Kris Allen: Jason Mraz mixed with John Mayer and a splash of orgasmmm
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
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