community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
It's just like the Real World with babies
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
Randomize
