Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
A girl told me I was her "alcohol spirit animal" tonight. Somehow I think my whole life was secretly building up to this moment
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
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