i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
Oh my god. My pre-date bowl for nerves tuned into "I'm too high for this date" he kept talking about trucks and I couldn't stop making racial slurs.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
Omphalophobia is a real thing. don't ever fucking touch my belly button again dude
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
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